Trump, Kim Jong-un Meet for Second Summit in Nogales

Our best associate solitary reporters, Johanna Jones and Susanna Sherman, have been really busy these days. 

 

We sent them to the US-Mexico border at Nogales, Arizona, where Border Patrol agents have been happily separating children from their parents.

 

Jones and Sherman are the only reporters who observed something that astonished even them.

 

Donald Trump has a new close personal friend — North Korean tyrant Kim Jong-un.

 

As Jones and Sherman watched, a US Army helicopter landed at the heavily fortified Border Control station.

 

From the helicopter emerged Kim Jong-un and Trump.

 

“This is how we keep vermin out of our country,” Trump explained to Kim.

 

“But in the Democratic Peoples Republic of Korea, you do a better job of it. How do you do it? I need your help here, my friend.”

 

Kim smiled and said, “Donnie, that’s easy. We just kill them. Makes it easier on everybody.”

 

“If you like,” Kim continued, “after you take all your soldiers out of South Korea, I will bring my version of border control here to Nogales. Then you’ll never have a problem with illegals coming into your great nation.”

 

Trump smiled and told Chief of Staff John Kelly, “John, get on that right away. Bring all our troops home from South Korea, that will save billions of dollars. Then do whatever my friend Kim Jong-un suggests.”

 

That’s when Kelly resigned — and Trump replaced him immediately with Kellyanne Conway.